The three pie charts compare the differences in percentage changes in four various categories of vehicles which have registered in Norway between year 2008 and 2018,as well as the future forecast of vehicles for 2028.
Overall, over a period of 10 years, petrol and diesel engine related vehicles were the by far the most popular options for Norwegians with new introduction of fully electric mode vehicles in 2018 whereas the usage of hybrid vehicles has been gained an extra popularity among them by 2018.The possibility of usage of fully electric, hybrid and diesel vehicles are expected be distributed in an almost same percentage with exception of petrol vehicles.
In 2008, the figure for the petrol vehicles stood at almost 70% of all while it came down to little less than 40%in 2018,one-fifth of decline. By contrast, the preferences for diesel vehicles has been grown at 46% in 2018 starting from one-third of all in comparison with 2008.The most striking feature has been the registration for fully electric vehicles in 2018 while hybrid cars or other vehicles have made up 11% in 2018 compared to 1% registration in 2008, a 10% increse.
By 2028,the proportions of vehicles are projected to be in almost same percentages( 30%) with exception of one-third of petrol vehicles, a remarkable drop in proportions.
Comments
Hey there Deepika, this is a good attempt at a difficult question. I would give it a Band 6
Introduction= Good and short. (although you don’t need the words “various” or “future”)
Overview= ok. You identify that petrol and diesel vehicles are the most popular in 2008 and 2018. However, this sentence is confusing “The possibility of usage of fully electric, hybrid and diesel vehicles are expected be distributed in an almost same percentage with exception of petrol vehicles.” This is how you can write it: “By 2028, it is predicted that fully electric, hybrid and diesel cars will make up a similar proportion of Norweigian vehicles”.
Body Paragraph 1: It is good that you look at 2008 to 2018 in this paragraph. However, you should make this clear to the examiner with a topic sentence. Something like “From 2008 to 2018, the largest shift was the rise of diesel vehicles at the expense of petrol vehicles”.
Body Paragraph 2: This paragraph is too short. Also, it is not clear what you are saying. Consider this “By 2028, the proportion of all of the vehicle types are projected to take up a third of the total. However, petrol vehicles are the exception: by 2028, they are expected to have shrunk quite dramatically to make up only 11% of the total.
Also, remember to leave a space after a comma.
Good answer. Your vocabulary is very good. I think this is one of the most difficult questions. Also, I think you should try to avoid 1-sentence paragraphs.
Good point Ale, it is better to avoid 1-sentence paragraphs, if possible.
Thanks Sir Eli, I was as an urgent answer as well, I did it before my duty starts within 20 min and no profreeding. I just wanted to do it somehow. There are many mistakes that I should ‘ve concentrate on. I will give it another attempt.
Thanks for the encouragement!I will do my best to improve my writing.
And I will be here to help you!
Thats very kind of you!
The given three pie charts represent the percentage changes in vehicle registration in Norway in terms of vehicle category. (fully electric, hybrid, diesel and petrol) over a 10 year period of time and a forecast for year 2028.
Overall, it can be seen that petrol and diesel vehicles were by far the most popular vehicles in 2008 and 2018. However, in 2028 it is expected that the figures for given 3 types of vehicles will make up almost similar proportions.
Looking into more details, in 2008, the percentage of petrol vehicle ownership stood at almost 70% of all making up the biggest proportion for given time period whereas the figure has been fallen down to less little under 40% in 2018, a 30% decrease. By contrast, Diesel vehicles were far more popular ,at 40% in 2018 in comparison with 2008. Hybrid vehicles have grown in remarkable proportions by 2018 while fully electric vehicles has been introduced to Norwegians in the same year.
In 2028, as can be seen in the pie chart, petrol vehicles are expected to be shrunken upto 11%,an almost six-fold decline compared to year 2008 while Diesel vehicles are projected to be in almost similar figures by 2028. Fully electric vehicles will be quintupled and there will be almost three-fold growth in Hybrid vehicles as predicted.
Very impressive writing. This would score around 7. Good structure, length, intro, overall, body paragraphs. Well done. Lots of good contrasting words (by contrast, overall, however). You still forget the space after a comma “,at”. Grammar note: we don’t usually use “shrink” in the passive form.
Oh! Thats interesting! I am not kind of the person that throw in the towel. I did this right after I came from duty. Thanks for the response and correction. I keep writing here in this community.
Great! You are doing very well.
Thanks Sir Hardie!
This is a big improvement from your first writing. Nice one!
Thanks James!