Examiner Comments
There is a clear position that directly answers the question. The writer believes that individuals (as well as governments and large companies) can do things to improve the environment.
There are three main ideas to support this position. Firstly, there are lifestyle changes that will yield positive effects on the government. Secondly, through purchasing decisions, individuals can exert influence on companies to make changes in line with improving the environment. Finally, the writer suggests that collaborative efforts between the government, companies and individuals will have the greatest effect.
The writer also uses a combination of examples, considerations and studies to develop their ideas.
The response follows a logical structure.
There are three body paragraphs in total, and each paragraph has a clear central theme.
Throughout the response there are a variety of linking words and it is easy to follow the logic of the writer as they explain their ideas.
This response contains a large range of accurately used advanced vocabulary:
- Hold the power: The question of whether individuals hold the power to improve the environment has become a topic of contention.
- Pivotal: I firmly believe that individuals also play a pivotal role in fostering environmental improvements.
- Make conscious decisions: Individuals possess the ability to make conscious decisions that collectively yield substantial positive impacts on the environment.
- Curtail: If every person in a developed country reduced meat consumption by half, greenhouse gas emissions could be significantly curtailed.
- Sustainable alternatives: The growing demand for eco-friendly products has prompted companies to develop sustainable alternatives, reduce packaging, and invest in cleaner production methods.
- Rectify: Expecting these entities alone to rectify environmental issues overlooks the fact that individual actions can create a bottom-up pressure that complements top-down efforts.
Spelling is accurate.
The provided essay contains several instances of advanced grammar. Here are some examples with the corresponding parts of the essay:
Conditional Sentences (Second Conditional):
- Example: “if every person in a developed country reduced meat consumption by half, greenhouse gas emissions could be significantly curtailed.”
- This sentence is an example of a second conditional structure, where a hypothetical situation (reducing meat consumption) and its potential result (reducing greenhouse gas emissions) are presented.
Participle Phrases:
- Example: “By adopting sustainable practices such as reducing single-use plastics, conserving energy, and practising responsible consumption, individuals contribute to reducing pollution and conserving resources.”
- The participle phrases “reducing single-use plastics,” “conserving energy,” and “practising responsible consumption” provide additional information about the actions individuals take.
Passive Voice:
- Example: “The growing demand for eco-friendly products has prompted companies to develop sustainable alternatives, reduce packaging, and invest in cleaner production methods.”
- The passive voice is used in “has prompted” to emphasize the action taken by an unspecified subject (the growing demand) on the companies.
Complex Sentence Structures:
- Example: “Furthermore, individuals exert considerable influence through their purchasing decisions.”
- This sentence uses a complex structure to convey the idea of individuals influencing through their purchasing decisions.
Comparative and Superlative Adjectives:
- Example: “Collaborative endeavours that involve both governments, companies, and individuals will yield the most effective and lasting results.”
- The comparative adjective “most effective” and the superlative adjective “lasting” are used to compare and emphasize the results of collaborative endeavors.
Advanced Vocabulary and Formal Language:
- Example: “undeniably hold significant sway in shaping environmental policies and practices”
- The use of “undeniably” and “sway” demonstrates an advanced vocabulary choice, and the formal tone contributes to the overall sophistication of the essay.
Parallel Structure:
- Example: “reducing single-use plastics, conserving energy, and practising responsible consumption”
- The parallel structure of this list emphasizes the equal importance of each action and creates a balanced and organised sentence.
These examples showcase various advanced grammar features used in the essay to convey complex ideas and arguments effectively.
Useful Vocabulary
Hold is often used with nouns such as power, office, or responsibility to indicate that someone has a particular position of power or authority.
The question of whether individuals hold the power to improve the environment has become a topic of contention
To bring something about is to cause something to happen.
Governments and large corporations can bring about significant change
Pivotal means central and important, like a pivotal figure, a pivotal role, or a pivotal idea.
I firmly believe that individuals also play a pivotal role in fostering environmental improvements.
To make conscious decisions means to be fully aware of the choices made.
Individuals possess the ability to make conscious decisions that collectively yield substantial positive impacts on the environment.
Adopting a new practice, attitude, or plan means to begin to have it.
By adopting sustainable practices such as reducing single-use plastics, conserving energy, and practising responsible consumption, individuals contribute to reducing pollution and conserving resources.
To exert influence, authority, or pressure is to use it in a strong or determined way in order to produce a particular effect.
Individuals exert considerable influence through their purchasing decisions.
A growing demand means an increasing need for goods or services that customers want to buy or use.
The growing demand for eco-friendly products has prompted companies to develop sustainable alternatives, reduce packaging, and invest in cleaner production methods.
Sustainable alternatives refer to products, materials, or practices that have a lower environmental impact and are more socially responsible. Sustainable alternatives are made from materials and sources that are able to be either composted by mother nature or utilized in some other ways.
The growing demand for eco-friendly products has prompted companies to develop sustainable alternatives, reduce packaging, and invest in cleaner production methods.
To drive change means to start or create change.
Governments and large corporations possess greater resources and regulatory authority to drive change on a larger scale.
To rectify is to put right and to correct.
Expecting these entities alone to rectify environmental issues overlooks the fact that individual actions can create a bottom-up pressure that complements top-down efforts.
To hold sway is to have great power or influence over a particular person, place, or domain.
While governments and large corporations undeniably hold significant sway in shaping environmental policies and practices, the notion that individuals are incapable of making a difference is unfounded.
