The process diagram shows the eight steps involved in making a wine.
Overall, there are eight clear stages in the process, starting from picking and ending with the wine is taken to the supermarket. At three stages, waste is composted.
In the first stage, the grapes are picked in bunches. These grapes are taken to be juiced. The diagram reveals that it takes 400 ripe grapes to make 3,000 ml of juice. In the following stage, that juice is taken to be ferment for a total of two weeks.
After the two weeks, the fermented juice is taken to be filtered while any waste is composted. Again, the filtering process results in waste which is similarly composted. This leaves a period where the wine is left in large wooden barrels.
The final stages show how the wine is bottled into 750 ml bottles which are transported to the supermarket by lorry.
(3 votes, average: 7.33 out of 9)
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Comments
Very impressive writing Ale. I counted that you wrote 151 words. Very lucky: you don’t want to be below 150 words as you can lose marks. I like your short introduction and your paragraph order is good- you divide the paragraphs by periods of time. This is logical and clever. However, you missed out the first time that waste is composted (stage 2). You would lose marks for this. Also, you incorrectly put an article with “wine” in the introduction: “eight steps involved in making wine” (“wine” is uncountable). Anyway, keep up the good work.
Eli, can we write the introduction as “The given process diagram illustrates the eight phases involved in the production of a bottle of wine”?
Yes, that’s a great introduction.
Ahhh, I meant to write “a bottle of wine”. Thank you Eli