Wai Fong

Wai Fong

In recent years, electric cars have been promoted to alleviate environmental impacts as they are more environmentally friendly when compared to petrol and diesel cars. However, a lack of infrastructure for the use of electric cars and the high prices of these vehicles stop people from buying them. In my opinion, the government may offer incentives and improve facilities for the electric car owners.

People are reluctant to buy electric cars for two reasons: a lack of facilities for maintaining the use of electric cars and the huge expenses of owning an electric car. Firstly, as this kind of cars is still a cutting-edge innovation, the facilities for electric vehicles are not yet abundant. For this reason, people might have to drive a long way to find a charge station. Unlike driving a petrol-driven car, drivers are able to find a petrol station quite easily. Another factor which deter people from buying an electric car is that the purchase of these vehicles is expensive; this makes owning an electric car a far-reaching dream to many people.

The government has the key to dealing with this situation. One of the probable solution is that the government could develop electric car-related facilities, such as charge stations, so that it would become more convenient for people driving electric cars. The government may also consider providing subsidies for people to install their own charging stations at their garages, which enables users to charge their cars whenever they are home. Another possible proposal is that the government could offer tax reduction for electric car owners to incentivise people to buy these cars. If the cost for electric vehicles and petrol vehicles were the same, no one would like to choose the one which is devastating to the environment.

In conclusion, people decide not to buy electric cars because they are too expensive and it is inconvenient to own them. The government may combat this problem by offering tax reduction to attract people to buy these cars and developing more facilities for the use of these vehicles.

Community Band Score

2 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 9 (2 votes, average: 8.00 out of 9)
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Very good

  • Wow, I wish I could write like this. Can you give me some tips? 
  • This is a really good answer, I can’t see any mistakes.
  • Great vocabulary, I didn’t know the word _____ and ______.
  • Very clever ideas. They clearly relate to the question. 

Good

  • Your grammar is very good. However, I think you made a mistake in the sentence _______. I think it should be _______.
  • Your introduction/overview is really good. However, I think ______ is a mistake. It should be _________.
  • In general, your spelling is good but you misspelled the word ______. 

Comments

  1. Great essay Fion ????
    + Great linking words to develop your ideas: e.g. “For this reason”
    + Very clear topic sentences.
    + Great conclusion summarising your ideas
    + Clear structure
    + Problems and solutions are clearly related
    + Lots of advanced grammar and vocabulary
    – Make sure that all of your ideas are developed. To be sure of this, write at least two sentences for each idea (and ideally an example). Some examiners might think that your idea about electric cars being too expensive might not be fully developed. 
    – When you give your position in the introduction, make sure it is exactly relevant to the question. For example, “In my opinion, to encourage people to buy electric vehicles, the government may offer incentives and improve facilities for the electric car owners.”

  2. Good job Fion! You have good arguments in this essay. You also properly use words related to this topic. Eli is right that you make sure your ideas are developed. I know it’s easier said than done, but with a lot of practice, I know you are capable of cracking the writing test!

    All the best to you!

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