Glin

Glin

Preference of working greatly vary among people. Working from home is an option, which has been exploited by a large number of working population recently. It is felt that the easy to assess work in one’s own comfort has outweighed the congested cabin atmosphere and also exempted from the busy traffic. This trend is considered to be negative than a positive approach.

In the first place, during the current pandemic situation, a fraction of the employment sector has shifted its working style to a home-based approach. For example, almost all the information technological companies has provided all their emplores with the facilities to enable them to involve in work at their home or any safe area. This had extensively helped the employees to work at their own comfortable time along with taking care of household activities. The work from home phenomenem also was adapted easily by the people since they did not have to travel long distance or face heavy traffic, which saved timed to catch up for the work as early as possible.

The new manner in which people are allowed to work can change into a negative aspect since they would affect the personal life of these individuals. Work responsibilities of the people have been increased in comparison to that of a specific time duration at the office. For example, the meeting could be conducted at any time with the availability of internet facilities at some in a time suitable to the head of the department, which can be even during the later night. As a result, the time spent for the family will be affected due to this working pattern and also out of focus from the work.

To conclude, despite of having the work completed at the comfortable environment of the individual and without the need of traveling, there are several drawbacks such as interference with family time and lack of concentration into the work.

Community Band Score

1 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 91 vote, average: 6.00 out of 9 (1 votes, average: 6.00 out of 9)
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Very good

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  • This is a really good answer, I can’t see any mistakes.
  • Great vocabulary, I didn’t know the word _____ and ______.
  • Very clever ideas. They clearly relate to the question. 

Good

  • Your grammar is very good. However, I think you made a mistake in the sentence _______. I think it should be _______.
  • Your introduction/overview is really good. However, I think ______ is a mistake. It should be _________.
  • In general, your spelling is good but you misspelled the word ______. 

Comments

  1. Good essay Glin 😊
    + Some good vocabulary: “enable” is a great word for an IELTS essay. 
    + Body paragraph 2 is well developed. You explain why you think it is a negative development. However, you could make this clearer by starting the paragraph by saying that many people work longer hours by working from home and then supporting it with examples. 
    + Good that your conclusion doesn’t have any new ideas. 
    + Good structure. However, you need to have a second reason.
    – Be clear on your position in the introduction: e.g. “I would argue that this is a negative development”
    – You can simplify your introduction. Remember, you simply need to introduce the topic and then state your opinion. 
    – Be careful with spelling: “emplores”
    – “Despite” doesn’t have “of” afterwards. 
    – I see one reason: “the pandemic”- the question asks to give “reasons”. This will lower your score. 
    – You start with “In the first place,” but you don’t have a second idea. This makes your paragraph seem incomplete. 

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