Wai Fong

Wai Fong

A number of people suggest that building large roads to the city center is the best means of reducing time required for people commuting to work. Others argue that there are better methods to decrease the travelling time needed to work. Personally, I believe developing public transport system and promoting fexible working hours and home-office are more efficient in reducing the commuting time.
People who support building large roads contend that it can ameliorate traffic problems. A wider road allows more vehicles commuting at the same time, which alleviates traffic congestion in city centers. Additionally, advocates suggest that buses might become more popular among commuters due to the fact that they became less affected by traffic congestion if wider roads were built. This further relieves the traffic problems in city centers.
Turning to the other side of the argument, some people think that there are better ways to shorten the commuting time to city center: development of public transport system and allowing flexible working hours and work place. Firstly, the expansion of metro system is conducive to both road traffic condition and the environment. More people are able to commute by a train rather than a car; the disastrous impact of a train on the environment is far less than that of some petrol-driven vehicles when it comes to the exhaust gas released by the vehicles. Moreover, the government should encourge flexible working hours or even home-office by offering incentives to companies which are located in city centers. In this way, less people might have to commute to city centers; for those who need to go there would find it more convenient to travel to their destinations. For instance, if more companies allow their employees to start working at three different hours, people going to city center are diverted to three different time, which prevents all employees commuting to the city center at the same time.
In conclusion, I support the view that there are more efficient methods to tackle the traffic problems despite the fact that building larger roads is beneficial to relieving congestion. Developing public transport system and encouraging people to work at home and work flexibly are more effective ways to deal with this situation.

Community Band Score

2 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 92 votes, average: 8.00 out of 9 (2 votes, average: 8.00 out of 9)
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Very good

  • Wow, I wish I could write like this. Can you give me some tips? 
  • This is a really good answer, I can’t see any mistakes.
  • Great vocabulary, I didn’t know the word _____ and ______.
  • Very clever ideas. They clearly relate to the question. 

Good

  • Your grammar is very good. However, I think you made a mistake in the sentence _______. I think it should be _______.
  • Your introduction/overview is really good. However, I think ______ is a mistake. It should be _________.
  • In general, your spelling is good but you misspelled the word ______. 

Comments

    1. I think it is good to spend longer writing practice answers and then gradually learn how to speed up your answers. In this way, you’ll develop well thought out techniques and structures for your task 2 answers.

  1. Great answer Fion! ????
    + Good introduction (your position is clear)
    + Clear structure
    + Lots of good vocabulary for presenting the ideas that you do not agree with (“People who support”, “advocates”)
    + Clearly restating your position for the conclusion. 
    + Good use of examples. 
    Some minor corrections:
    – the disastrous impact of a train on the environment = the environmental impact of a train 
    – less people = “fewer” people
    Also, you mentioned that this essay took 45 minutes to write. If you want to cut it down, I would suggest getting rid of one of your alternatives to wider roads. In this essay, you have 3 alternatives; one is enough. 
    Please take the time to give feedback to two other students in the community.  ????

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